Shards of a Broken Dream
by AngelicTrinity
Summary: I remembered nothing of my life as Reverie Gottschalk, the Dream Demon and the Ruler of Clover Tower, after what was apparently a colossal breakdown that shook all of the territories to the core. But I did have a few memories of a different life- life as a college student before I died and was born as the person I am today . SI/OC reincarnation fic.


**Well, I decided to try writing out this fic again. It's a self-insert- more accurately a self-insert reincarnation fic. Quite frankly, this fic is going to be an emotional roller coaster for numerous reasons. And in fact the prologues (this is the first one and there are going to be either two or three more) are going to be extremely dark.**

 **There's a reason that this several parter is called 'The beginning of the end'.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the Diamond/Joker/Clover/Heart no Kuni no Alice series. I do, however, own my character's soul.**

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 **The Beginning of the End - Part I**

"Hah... Ah...h... Ah..."

Hell.

That was the only word I could think of to describe the sight in front of me. A vision straight from the depths of hell itself.

Pillars of fire as tall as the Tower itself painted the normal azure sky an eerie red. It reminded me of blood splattered all over the ground. I could hear the distant screams of the citizens as they fled, abandoning everything to escape the raging inferno that did not discriminate in who it razed and turned to ash. No one and nothing in it's path was spared.

 _Ash._ My mind was numb and I couldn't do anything but _stare._ All I could do was watch as Clover Tower and the town around it was mercilessly devoured by the flames. My mind wanted to completely reject the scene in front of me. To label this as being a dream. But the part of me that adamantly refused to ever drown in the deep sea of denial told me that what I was seeing was real.

Clover Tower was on fire and the blazing inferno only grew bigger as they continued to spread.

I felt the strength that had driven me here leave as I collapsed on to the ground like a marionette with its strings cut. I was too late. I was far too late. Despite having broken out of where I had been held captive, my captors had made good on their promise to destroy everything that I valued and cared for.

It was gone. It was all gone.

My eyes burned, but I didn't bother wiping away the tears. Instead, I used what little strength I still had left to slam my hand into the ground. There was a loud crack followed by pain shooting up through my arm; I didn't have to look at my hand to know it was broken.

But my pain was nothing compared to what my citizens felt as they fled from the merciless flames.

Their agony, their despair… I could feel it all. Hear all of their thoughts as confusion about threatened to overwhelm them. I could hear them as they raged at me, wondering why I had allowed all of this to happen in the first place.

Why hadn't I protected them?

I wanted to scream. Destroy something. _Anything_ but just sit here and stare… completely helpless to do anything but watch the territory I ruled over _burn_. But as I opened my mouth to do that, I found myself choking and gasping for air as I struggled to breathe. Either from still catching my breath or the sheer horror of the situation, I didn't know. Perhaps both.

And then I laughed.

The laughter sounded like it belonged to a mad woman. Broken and resigned. But I suppose that shouldn't have been surprising because that was exactly what I was. _Mad._ No matter how much I denied it, no matter how much I refused to accept it, I was _mad_. Everyone in Wonderland was mad to a degree, so why should I be any different?

Just because I had memories of a previous life? Because I hated killing and was considered an outcast in this chaotic world for having morals? Because I didn't kill people for the pettiest reasons? Because I somehow believed that being different made me special in some way?

Was everything I had ever done _meaningless?_

I was such a fool.

The laughter soon turned into screaming as it hit me.

I screamed. And kept on screaming because it was the only thing that I could think of. It was the only thing I could _do_. Even when I started running out of air and I struggled to catch my breath, I continued screaming.

At some point I stopped. Either because I felt that there was nothing to scream about any more or because I had screamed myself raw and my throat could no longer support being vocal about my grief.

That was when my emotions hit me like a tidal wave.

I allowed my anger, hatred, despair as well as all of my other negative feelings to consume me. I no longer saw any point in holding them back, in fighting against them for the sake of not lashing out at everyone. I wondered why I even bothered.

No one in this godforsaken world gave a damn about anything or anyone but themselves. They were too self-centered and the only thing they cared about was making sure they got what they wanted, damn the consequences. While the people of Wonderland were capable of being loyal to others, the only person who mattered in the end was _them._

Gray was the perfect example. For someone who was supposedly loyal, he was also quick to abandon me when his girlfriend didn't like him hanging around me despite the fact that I was his boss and he was my second-in-command. All because she was so fucking insecure.

I squelched the small voice of reason that tried to speak up, the voice that said I had allowed him to leave because…

Because…

...No. I was through being nice. I was through being rationale. I was through being the one who everyone stepped over because she refused to shoot someone for something so stupid as them looking at me wrong.

I was _done._

Holding out my hands in front of me I began to materialize my weapons as I hardened my resolve. They were weapons that I had personally commissioned- blades that I could extend and retract at will. It meant getting up close and personal, but I didn't mind. The blades were extremely effective if you played your cards right, and I had been training with these weapons for a long time.

At the same time, I reversed my time on my broken hand. It was like it was never broken in the first place.

Despite the heaviness and ache of my body, the difficulty breathing, and how difficult I found it to stand up again, I managed. Taking a deep breath, I steadied and prepared myself.

I wasn't going to delude myself. I was not going to survive this. Not that I cared whether I survived or not- in fact, I preferred dying. I saw no point in living any more when everything I had been responsible for no longer existed.

But there was something I needed to do before I died. Something I would not allow to go unresolved no matter what- even if meant having to come back as a ghost to achieve it. I needed to avenge their gruesome deaths. My workers. My pets. The people I had been friends with once they realized I was _nothing_ like the others. Almost everyone I had cared for. It was the least I could do. They hadn't deserved to die because of me.

If only I had been stronger. If only…

I shook my head. This was no time for regrets. Regrets wouldn't bring them back and it would only distract me. I wiped the remainder of my tears- crying wouldn't bring anything back. It wouldn't bring back my territory, my people, everything in this world that was once mine. With my weapons, the blades fully extended, I proceeded towards the burning territory- allowing my anger and hatred to fuel me as I proceeded to make good on my vengeful promise of making those who were responsible for the destruction of my territory and people pay.

I would make them regret everything.

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 **Yup. The main character is on a quest for vengeance. This ain't going to be pretty. Hopefully you guys stick around to read the other parts.**

 **Don't forget to review because reviews are ways of telling me that you appreciate my work!**


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